Life is a team sport. Whether with family, friends, mentors, or coaches, we are designed for connections.
Yet, many of us hesitate to extend or receive help due to past wounds of hurt, betrayal, and rejection. During a recent conversation with a friend and therapist, I gained insights into the unintended consequences of building emotional walls for protection. These walls, originally meant to shield from pain, can ironically become barriers preventing the love, companionship, and community we seek.
So, how can we navigate this challenge?
𝐀𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐥𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐞, 𝐅𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐥: While easier said than done, acknowledging past hurts is the crucial first step. Forgiving, not just others but also ourselves, allows healing to begin. This process liberates us from hold of pain, guilt, and shame, enabling forward movement.
𝐀𝐜𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐑𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲: Recognize that relationships involve two people, and blame is seldom one-sided. Acknowledging your role in past outcomes is essential, but equally important is understanding that it's not solely your fault. Acceptance of shared responsibility paves the way for self-forgiveness and personal growth.
𝐋𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐀𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐏𝐮𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞: We cannot change the past, but the future is within our grasp. Embrace the lessons you learned and apply them to the present, steering your life towards a different outcome. By looking forward with intention, you empower yourself to create a future shaped by newfound wisdom.
While these steps offer a starting point, doing this alone can be overwhelming. Life is meant to be lived in connection with others. Seek the support of those who can guide you through these steps, helping you emerge on the other side whole and resilient.
Remember, we all need each other to make life worth living. Identify who you need in your current phase—whether a coach, mentor, therapist, friend, lover, family, or community—and actively seek them out.
To the women reading this, if you recognize that a coach is the missing piece on your journey—especially if you're tired of prioritizing others over yourself, please reach out today. Let's collaborate to help you choose yourself without sacrificing the love and care of those dear to you.
Click the link in the comments to explore if we're a great fit. The only cost is not seeking the help you need, for the true expense lies in missing the opportunity for positive transformation.
